Life After Religion…

Led by YOU.

Post-Religion Confidence Coach helping women rebuild self-trust and confidently step into the life they choose—without guilt, fear, or someone else’s rules.

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Sandra Jarvis — Post-Religion Confidence Coach

Cor.E Energy | Certified Trauma Recovery | Certified Religious Recovery | Energy Leadership Index-Master Practitioner | Certified Relationship and Betrayal Trauma

  • How do I start choosing my life—on purpose?

  • How do I trust my judgment without needing a rulebook?

  • How do I stay confident around people who don’t agree with me?

  • How do I raise strong, ethical kids without fear-based parenting?

  • Who will I become when I stop performing—and start leading my own life?

If religion taught you that someone else had all the answers, you’re probably wondering…

I wondered:

  • Could I trust my own judgment?

  • Had I actually chosen my life—
    or just followed the path laid out for me?

  • What did I value?

  • What was the legacy I wanted to leave behind??

And, why the hell were we all wearing pants?

(Yes… my brain got a little weird for a minute.)

When I left religion, I thought I was just getting an extra day in my weekend.

I didn’t realize I was also stepping out of the only framework I’d ever used to make sense of my life.

At first, it was disorienting. Without a rulebook, I found myself questioning things I’d never questioned before—not because I was falling apart, but because I was thinking for myself for the first time.

But here’s what I want you to know:

When you stop outsourcing authority and remove the rules, even everyday things can feel oddly negotiable for a bit.

That’s not a crisis!

It’s your brain recalibrating after a lifetime of being given all the answers on how to “choose the right.”

Hi…I’m Sandra!

If you’ve made it this far, my guess is you’ve lived through this, too.

You were probably raised to believe that if you could just do everything right—say the right thing, wear the right smile, raise the perfect kids, keep the spotless house—then you’d finally be good enough. That worthiness was something you earned through obedience, sacrifice, and sheer exhaustion.

Am I right?

Me too.

I was raised in a high-demand system that taught me love was conditional, belonging was fragile, and control was salvation. I was the good girl. The perpetual volunteer. The overachiever. The woman who held it all together while quietly falling apart.

My life looked picture-perfect on the outside—but inside, I was drowning in self-doubt, shame, and invisible expectations I could never meet.

Then life cracked me open.

Schedule a Session with Me Today!

For a while, everything unraveled. I questioned what I believed, who I was, and whether I could trust myself without a rulebook. It was disorienting—and yes, painful—but it was also the beginning of something else.

What followed was a long season of untangling, healing, and learning how to listen inward instead of looking outside myself for answers.

Eventually, I emerged knowing three things:

It was an invitation to step out of perfectionism, people-pleasing, and fear-based living.

I wasn’t failing at life.
I’d just been trained to be “good” instead of being myself.

I didn’t need new rules.
I needed self-trust—for my body, my instincts, my inner voice.

These truths became the heartbeat of my work.

Now, I work with women who are asking different questions — empowering questions.

My clients are no longer lost…they are ready!

They’re standing in a wide-open space of choice —
something most of them haven’t experienced before —
and they want to move forward with confidence, not doubt or fear.

THIS IS WHERE POST-RELIGIOUS CONFIDENCE WORK BEGINS.

Because you don’t need more answers.

You just need to trust in YOUR answers.

I'm In!

Confidence after religion isn’t something you stumble onto.

It’s something you build with intention.

True confidence doesn’t look loud or certain.

It doesn’t come from having all the answers—or replacing one belief system with another.

It looks quieter than that. And stronger.

It looks like trusting yourself to make decisions without needing approval.
It looks like setting boundaries without over-explaining.
It looks like staying grounded around people who don’t agree with you—without shrinking or hardening.

Confidence after religion is knowing you can handle your life, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Even when people are disappointed with your decisions.
Even when there’s no clear “right” choice.

It’s not arrogance. It’s self-leadership.

It’s the shift from asking, “Am I doing this right?”
to asking, “Does this align with my values and reflect who I am?”

Once that shift happens, everything changes!

Are you ready to move forward?

You’ve already done the hard part.

  • You’ve questioned.

  • You’ve walked away.

  • You’ve decided to live a different life.

Now you need the confidence to move on and create the life you’ve always dreamed of living.

If you’re committed to choosing your life on purpose…

let's chat!

No pressure. No fixing. Just clarity.

What my clients are saying…

  • "Coaching with Sandra helped me better understand the power I have in creating what I want in my life."

    —JESSICA R.—


    Coaching with Sandra helped me better understand the power I have in creating what I want in my life. I learned that living a good life isn't about having certain things, but rather, it's how I think about those things that make a difference. Sandra's kind personality and gentle nature make it easy to open up and dig deep when life feels overwhelming. I'm so grateful for the lessons I've learned and the changes I've made.

  • "In just a few short months...my life has completely changed!"

    —CANDICE M.—

    Sandra is such a great coach! She taught me how to have peace, how to accomplish my goals, and how to build better relationships. Sandra has a great deal of knowledge to help you better understand how your mind and body work so you can take control of the things inside of you. In just a few short months, my perspective has shifted, my energy has increased, and my life has completely changed. I would highly recommend Sandra as a coach.

  • "Thank you...for getting my head cleared and helping me see the importance of everything I do."

    —TAYLOR B.—

    Coaching with Sandra has helped me get back on track with the things I want to accomplish in my life. As a mom of 3 young kids, I have struggled to stay in a healthy place mentally, especially on those days when I feel like I get nothing done. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is to give everything I do equal value. That concept alone has made such an improvement for my mental health and has reduced a lot of stress for me. Thank you, Sandra, for getting my head cleared and helping me understand the importance of everything I do.

  • "Because of {Sandra's} coaching, I overcame fears that were holding me back and keeping me from reaching for my dreams."

    —LARA L.—

    Sandra has helped me to recognize my strengths while working on my weak areas. I have grown emotionally and spiritually, and because of her coaching, I overcame fears that were holding me back and keeping me from reaching for my dreams. I even had the courage to open my own publishing company and put my art into the world in a way I never imagined I could. Sandra was easy to open up to, and her kindness is evident in her approach. I would highly recommend her to anyone looking to explore their self-worth.

  • "Sandra gets it. She’s done the work, too..."

    —SHELICE M.—

    I’ve done years of work to understand my issues, but after just a few sessions with Sandra, I uncovered problems and discovered solutions that had never before occurred to me. Sandra gets it. She’s done the work, too, and because of that, she can be empathetic while still holding you accountable for your own thoughts, feelings, and actions.

  • "I have been so impressed with her personal and welcoming approach. "

    —ERICA P.—

    I have been working with Sandra for about ½ a year. I have been so impressed with her personal and welcoming approach. She listens well and makes me feel comfortable. She also makes me work hard and dig deep. I really needed to ask myself some tough questions and she has helped me find ways to answer some of those questions and then ask more. I think that my time with Sandra has given me a chance to see my brain's patterns and find ways to change those patterns that I no longer want to be part of my life. I look forward to continuing self-enlightenment and focusing more on my goals as I continue to work with her.

  • "I come away from each session feeling uplifted and motivated, ready to tackle all the things on my list. "

    —MJ B.—

    I hired Sandra to help me with some personal issues that had been holding me back for years. Not only has she been an amazing coach who has taught, encouraged, and supported me through the process, but she also has a quick wit and great sense of humor. I come away from each session feeling uplifted and motivated, ready to tackle all the things on my list. Coaching has given me the extra energy I needed to make real change happen in my life. And the best part is--I’ve learned how to create that energy over and over again. The list of ways my life has become better is too long to list!

  • "Sandra will be my coach for life...her ability to help me be the best version of me is that good! "

    —JEN S.—

    Although I’ve always been interested in personal development, I’d never considered hiring a life coach until my friend recommended Sandra. When I started working with her, I was amazed at how quickly my life changed. I used to spend a lot of time playing the victim. I’d ruminate about all of the things going wrong in my life. Sandra’s judgment journals helped me see how I was creating all of the negative energy in my life, and it helped me recognize that I could raise my energy simply by becoming more aware of the way I think. Sandra will be my coach for life...her ability to help me be the best version of me is that good!

  • "Sandra challenges my old patterns of thinking, she catches me and encourages me when I stumble, and she celebrates my victories! "

    —BRIANA W.—

    Sandra has been such a joy to work with this past year. Together, we set personal and professional goals and, week by week, we chip away at them. What excitement and joy it has been to accomplish my goals! Sandra challenges my old patterns of thinking, she catches me and encourages me when I stumble, and she celebrates my victories! Perhaps most importantly, she laughs with me and together, we find joy in the pain. Through her coaching, I’ve been liberated to be myself.

  • "Should you hire Sandra? Hell yes!"

    —TIFFANY A.—

    Should you hire Sandra? Hell yes! There’s no amount of time or money that could adequately repay her for the lessons I’ve learned through her coaching. What started out as an experiment to see if coaching could help me be more committed to my goals, ended up being a life-changing experience. I highly recommend this program!

  • I’m so glad I took the leap and gave coaching a chance. Thanks to Sandra, my marriage just might survive!

    —TAMI R.—

    After just 3 months of coaching, I feel hope for my marriage again. One of the first things Sandra helped me do was decide whether or not I wanted to remain in my relationship. Once I had the answer to that question, I was able to put the tools I was learning to work. Although my husband hasn’t been involved in my coaching sessions, he started to see the changes I was making, and has sought out his own support through a 12-step program. Together, we’re figuring out how to love and respect each other again. I’m so glad I took the leap and gave coaching a chance. Thanks to Sandra, my marriage just might survive!

  • Sandra helped me give myself permission to explore new ways to live. I don't feel like I am stuck in a box anymore!

    —LIZZY P.—

    Sandra is AMAZING. Her techniques and tools she uses to help with religious deprogramming have been unique to me, and incredibly eye-opening. She knows the right kinds of questions to ask to get you thinking about perspective. I have been able to re-think a LOT of things in my life, and I don't think I have ever felt this FREE. She has assisted in my learning to think and act for myself and not for a religion. She has encouraged me to explore the world, and the different beliefs, religions, practices, and groups that live within it. Sandra helped me give myself permission to explore new ways to live. I don't feel like I am stuck in a box anymore!

  • "Sandra has helped me find clarity in my world by holding up a mirror and having me really look at who I am."

    —ANNETTE M.—

    It is hard to describe everything Sandra has meant to me, not just as a coach, but as a friend! She will forever hold a special place in my heart! My life has been enriched through her coaching. Sandra has helped me find clarity in my world by holding up a mirror and having me really look at who I am. She taught me about thought processes and how they affect my feelings. She has helped me understand emotions and become more resilient when difficult circumstances arise. Her coaching helped me find some sheer footing to stand on so that I can start to dream again. She has truly been a blessing in my life.

  • "She helped me recognize what was most important in my life and encouraged me to set aside the negative judgments that were pulling me down."

    —KARINA F.—

    When I joined Sandra’s program, my family was going through a really difficult time. She helped me recognize what was most important in my life and encouraged me to set aside the negative judgments that were pulling me down. I loved how the program focused on values and appreciated the opportunity to reflect on what was most important to me. I really enjoyed meeting with other women and learning that I wasn’t all that different in my struggles to accept who I am. This work has been life-changing.

  • "Her knowledge about how the brain works is extensive. She teaches me something new everytime we meet together. "

    —ANGELA A.—

    I love coaching with Sandra. She has taught me a new way of looking at the world and reacting to the problems I'm experiencing. Her knowledge about how the brain works is extensive. She teaches me something new everytime we meet together. She is always willing to help me with the areas that I want to improve. Most importantly, she helps me see my worth, and that is what really allows me to move forward and empowers me to make the changes I want in my life.

  • "Examining the thoughts that were creating my feelings was a powerful way to help me see how many possibilities there are for me, and showing me that my feelings are nothing to be afraid of was one of the greatest discoveries of my life!"

    —MELISSA B.—

    Sandra’s really smart. She helped me figure out why I felt so bad all the time and gave me tools to change. After six months, my life was back on track and I felt like myself again. Examining the thoughts that were creating my feelings was a powerful way to help me see how many possibilities there are for me, and showing me that my feelings are nothing to be afraid of was one of the greatest discoveries of my life! I’m grateful for the things she taught me and for her encouragement as I made changes in my life.

  • "I appreciated her ability to show me that I could choose the perspective I want when challenging situations arise."

    —SALLIE C.—

    I worked with Sandra for the past six months. In that time, she has become a trusted friend. I came to her because I wanted to know how to quit being a victim in my life. We worked on accepting responsibility and forgiving myself for some things in my past. I appreciated her ability to show me that I could choose the perspective I want when challenging situations arise. Sandra is so good at what she does! I highly recommend working with her. She is amazing!

Coming Soon!

Wait…That Was Optional? is a podcast for women navigating the weird, disorienting, sometimes hilarious aftermath of leaving religion. Hosted by Sandra Jarvis, each episode explores the questions no one warned you would come up—about identity, self-trust, conditioning, and why even normal things suddenly feel suspicious (including pants). With humor, wit, and grounded insight, this show offers companionship, clarity, and permission for anyone learning how to think—and live—for themselves. Join the waitlist to be among the first to hear the pilot episodes in January 2026!

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